Have you ever heard that we should be careful about what we wish for, care about, or what we look for in life? There are all sorts of stories out there. I have heard stories about people looking for their families when they were given up for adoption. I have heard stories about people doing their family tree and they find out that they have a convicted criminal in their family tree. I have heard stories of people looking into their DNA through a modern-day service and they are introduced to new family members that they did not know existed. Some things we find in the family or family tree are much appreciated, while others we may find to be hurtful.

1. Do you have a godly heritage or do you have a messy family tree? Please explain or give examples.

2. Even if you have a godly heritage, is there anything messy about your family tree?

3. Do you know anything about Jesus’ family tree?

This may come as a surprise, but I have heard it said, “Jesus’ family tree makes me uncomfortable.” There is the history of Judah and Tamar (Jesus’ great-grandparents) and this story is filled with sexual deception, trickery, and desertion. In Genesis 38:24-26, we read, “About three months later Judah was told, ‘Tamar your daughter-in-law has been immoral. Moreover, she is pregnant by immorality.’ And Judah said, ‘Bring her out, and let her be burned.’ As she was being brought out, she sent word to her father-in-law, ‘By the man to whom these belong, I am pregnant.’ And she said, ‘Please identify whose these are, the signet and the cord and the staff.’ Then Judah identified them and said, ‘She is more righteous than I, since I did not give her to my son Shelah.’ And he did not know her again.” 

Also, King David (Jesus’ great-grandfather) led by his sexual desire took another man’s wife and got her pregnant. In 2 Samuel 11:2-5, it says, “It happened, late one afternoon, when David arose from his couch and was walking on the roof of the king’s house, that he saw from the roof a woman bathing; and the woman was very beautiful. And David sent and inquired about the woman. And one said, ‘Is not this Bathsheba, the daughter of Eliam, the wife of Uriah the Hittite?’ So David sent messengers and took her, and she came to him, and he lay with her. (Now she had been purifying herself from her uncleanness.) Then she returned to her house. And the woman conceived, and she sent and told David, ‘I am pregnant.’” When he could not cover it up, he had the husband killed starting in verse 14 of the same chapter, “In the morning David wrote a letter to Joab and sent it by the hand of Uriah. In the letter he wrote, ‘Set Uriah in the forefront of the hardest fighting, and then draw back from him, that he may be struck down, and die.’ And as Joab was besieging the city, he assigned Uriah to the place where he knew there were valiant men. And the men of the city came out and fought with Joab, and some of the servants of David among the people fell. Uriah the Hittite also died.”

There are ancestors in Jesus’ family tree that will cause you to pause. For instance, Rahab is a great-grandmother of Jesus, and she was a prostitute from Jericho. Many may remember the story of Rahab, the prostitute that helped to save the Hebrew spies in Jericho. She helped them escape, and then when Jericho was conquered, she was spared. She married a Hebrew man named Salmon, and they had a son named Boaz. Moreover, Boaz takes a wife, but she is a refugee from another country, she is not even a Hebrew, and they both are great-grandparents of Jesus in this difficult family tree. However, Jesus has a plan for redeeming His people, including His family. He has provided a way for us to be redeemed through the bitterness that can fall upon us through our family circumstances.

4. Does it make your family’s situation feel better or worse knowing that Jesus’ family had such a troubled history?

We have probably picked up the overall love story of Ruth and Obed by now, but because of life’s circumstances, Naomi (Ruth’s mother-in-law) was bitter. She was bitter because her husband and two sons had been taken from her in death. She had left her home because of a famine. She is alone except for her one daughter-in-law, Ruth, and now they are destitute and need to gather the leftover grain from the fields.

5. Have you seen situations that lead to bitterness in the family? Please share.

6. Was the bitterness caused by outside forces (loss of job, house, poverty)? Or, was the bitterness caused by the family choices (addiction, adultery, divorce)? Do you see a difference?

In Ruth 1:19-22, it reads, “So the two of them went on until they came to Bethlehem. And when they came to Bethlehem, the whole town was stirred because of them. And the women said, ‘Is this Naomi?’ She said to them, ‘Do not call me Naomi; call me Mara, for the Almighty has dealt very bitterly with me. I went away full, and the Lord has brought me back empty. Why call me Naomi, when the Lord has testified against me and the Almighty has brought calamity upon me?’ So Naomi returned, and Ruth the Moabite her daughter-in-law with her, who returned from the country of Moab. And they came to Bethlehem at the beginning of barley harvest.” Naomi was bitter towards God, but God’s plan brought redemption to Naomi and Ruth. Picking up in Ruth 2:17-20, we read, “So she gleaned in the field until evening. Then she beat out what she had gleaned, and it was about an ephah of barley. And she took it up and went into the city. Her mother-in-law saw what she had gleaned. She also brought out and gave her what food she had left over after being satisfied. And her mother-in-law said to her, ‘Where did you glean today? And where have you worked? Blessed be the man who took notice of you.’ So she told her mother-in-law with whom she had worked and said, ‘The man’s name with whom I worked today is Boaz.’ And Naomi said to her daughter-in-law, ‘May he be blessed by the Lord, whose kindness has not forsaken the living or the dead!’ Naomi also said to her, ‘The man is a close relative of ours, one of our redeemers.’” 

7. Have you ever heard of a kinsman redeemer? If so, what is it?

8. Has a friend or relative ever played a redeeming role in your life? Please share.

As I studied this concept of a kinsman redeemer, this is a role in the Old Testament of a prominent male in your family whose role is to guard the family’s honor. They may have to avenge the wrongful death of a murdered relative. They may have to buy back the property of a family member that was sold during a hardship. They could redeem a family member who was sold into slavery. MacArthur wrote, “The Old Testament places a great deal of emphasis on the role of the goel (Hebrew for kinsman redeemer). There was a significant redemptive aspect to this person’s function.” In Ruth 3:9-13, it reads, “He said, ‘Who are you?’ And she answered, ‘I am Ruth, your servant. Spread your wings over your servant, for you are a redeemer.’ And he said, ‘May you be blessed by the Lord, my daughter. You have made this last kindness greater than the first in that you have not gone after young men, whether poor or rich. And now, my daughter, do not fear. I will do for you all that you ask, for all my fellow townsmen know that you are a worthy woman. And now it is true that I am a redeemer. Yet there is a redeemer nearer than I. Remain tonight, and in the morning, if he will redeem you, good; let him do it. But if he is not willing to redeem you, then, as the Lord lives, I will redeem you. Lie down until the morning.’”

We know that Boaz decides to become Ruth’s kinsman redeemer to lift her from a life of poverty, a life without a husband, and a life without a child. Also, we know that this turns Naomi’s feeling of bitterness toward her family life and turns it into a great blessing with grandchildren. In Ruth 4:13-17, we see how both Ruth and Naomi’s situation has been redeemed, “So Boaz took Ruth, and she became his wife. And he went in to her, and the Lord gave her conception, and she bore a son. Then the women said to Naomi, ‘Blessed be the Lord, who has not left you this day without a redeemer, and may his name be renowned in Israel! He shall be to you a restorer of life and a nourisher of your old age, for your daughter-in-law who loves you, who is more to you than seven sons, has given birth to him.’ Then Naomi took the child and laid him on her lap and became his nurse. And the women of the neighborhood gave him a name, saying, ‘A son has been born to Naomi.’ They named him Obed. He was the father of Jesse, the father of David.”

The kinsman redeemer is a great picture of what Jesus Christ can do in our lives. John MacArthur writes, “Every kinsman-redeemer was, in effect, a living illustration of the position and work of Christ with respect to His people: he is our true Kinsman-Redeemer, who becomes our human Brother, buys us back from our bondage to evil, redeems our lives from death, and ultimately returns to us everything we lost because of our sin.”

9. Do you see how Christ is our “true Kinsman Redeemer”? Please explain to the group.

10. There is no family trouble that is too great for our Kinsman Redeemer (Jesus). Please list and pray for those aspects of your family situations that need to be redeemed.